How Brief Kindness Boosts Our Happiness: The Science Behind Everyday Greetings

By: Josefa Brigham

Our longitudinal survey revealed that, on average, only 11.9% of students reported performing daily acts of kindness in the past month. This is particularly surprising given how simple such acts can be—so much so that one specific form of kindness often goes unnoticed despite strong scientific support. In this article, the spotlight is on greetings. This very brief moment has been studied extensively to understand its impact on our subjective well-being and overall emotional state. Findings show that these seemingly unconscious behaviors can strongly influence the flow of social interactions and people’s moods. A recent study even found that greeting behavior predicts life satisfaction (Ascigil, 2023). Continue reading to discover how this small interaction can become an opportunity for an act of kindness—one that may trigger a ripple of positive effects on well-being.

Emotional Contagion

Reflect on how you greet your closest friend: maybe with a big hug, a joke, or—on good days—even a small compliment. How did you feel before and after the interaction? Emotions like excitement, joy, or confidence may arise, or perhaps a sense of safety and tranquility. Now, think about the opposite situation—when your friend greets you with low energy or a subdued tone of voice. What do you feel then? Concern, sadness, or melancholy? Both verbal and nonverbal cues are quickly processed by the brain. After this rapid analysis, these emotional signals help us infer how the other person is feeling (Van Kleef, 2022).

It is Darwin that established emotions as a necessary function in order to survive as social animals. This alludes to the branch of psychology called functionalism, where William James the father of American psychology supported this by claiming how the only purpose for an emotion is to connect with others, regardless if it is aligned with how you truly feel or not. The last bit is connected to a more cognitive sophisticated process of empathy, where to “match someone else's energy” carries a social benefit. However, the primitive tendency to automatically mimic and synchronize expressions, vocalizations, postures, and movements with another person—thereby emotionally converging—is known as emotional contagion (Hatfield, Cacioppo, & Rapson, 1993). This concept, coined by Arthur S. Reber and further developed by Elaine Hatfield, highlights our capacity to transfer emotional states, potentially changing the tone of an entire day.

From a neuroscience perspective, mirror neurons provide the biological foundation for this process. In 1992, Giacomo Rizzolatti and colleagues discovered a group of neurons in monkeys that fired both when the monkeys acted and when they observed others performing the same action. Subsequent research has identified similar mirror neuron systems in humans, particularly within the inferior frontal gyrus (linked to language, social cognition, and executive functioning) and the inferior parietal cortex (involved in sensory integration, spatial reasoning, and attention). These areas play a central role in how we navigate our social world and connect with others (Tops, 2011; Hampshire, 2009).

Greetings as Acts of Kindness

How does this connect to greetings—and to acts of kindness? Greeting someone with a warm emotion or kind gesture (a hug, kiss, or handshake), a kind phrase (“I’m so happy to see you,” “You look great today”), or a caring question (“How did your presentation go?” “What did you do this weekend?”) are all subtle acts of kindness that transmit positive energy and directly affect another person's emotional state (Williams, 2008; Cook, 2018; Boothby & Bohns, 2020).

Physical touch, in particular, influences the nervous system and promotes prosocial behavior. For instance, individuals who experience physical warmth are more likely to do something generous for friends rather than themselves (Williams, 2008). In educational settings, teachers who greet students at the door foster smoother transitions between breaks and learning time. When these greetings are positive and intentional, research shows a 20% increase in academic engagement—equivalent to gaining an extra hour of active learning in a five-hour school day (Cook, 2018). These greetings need not be elaborate; even using a student’s name, offering a compliment, or extending a handshake can have significant effects.

Compliments and genuine questions enhance well-being, health, and a sense of belonging. Although compliments remain an under-researched topic, consistent findings indicate their value. They foster positive self-regard and social acceptance—key components of self-esteem (Leary & Downs, 1995; Leary et al., 1995; Boothby & Bohns, 2020). People often underestimate the power of compliments either due to social anxiety or because they fear their words might sound insincere. However, overcoming these self-limiting beliefs reveals the simple joy of connecting with others. Brief compliments such as “I like your shoes,” “Your hair looks amazing,” or “You did a great job” can genuinely uplift someone’s mood. Similarly, questions that show sincere interest—offering company, help, or simply a listening ear—also qualify as acts of kindness. Sonja Lyubomirsky and Kristin Layous propose that for such acts to maximize their positive impact, they should be practiced daily and chosen freely by the individual. These small, intentional gestures can easily be integrated into greetings. While some people may respond minimally in the moment, they often reflect on the interaction later—and likely feel good because of it.

This practice ties closely to compassion and its role in well-being. The article “Compassion in Action: Small Acts of Kindness That Make a Big Difference” further explores these connections and the benefits of incorporating kindness into daily life. Each day offers a chance to make the world a happier place. Though it may sound cliché, meaningful living doesn’t require grand acts or professional roles—just infusing small daily interactions with kindness. Even a single greeting can set off a butterfly effect, subtly influencing subsequent events in a positive direction.

Conclusion

Although greeting styles differ across cultures, the energy and intention behind them remain universally understood. When you feel energized, share that warmth—wherever you are—with a simple smile, the universal signal of happiness. These nonverbal gestures can be particularly valuable when traveling or communicating across language barriers. Recognizing how these fleeting moments can serve as opportunities for kindness allows you to enhance your well-being, especially during times of uncertainty, stress, or sadness. Don’t take the chance to greet others—whether loved ones or strangers—for granted. Savor those moments. Life is built from small interactions; why not increase the number of positive ones?

As the Greek philosopher Seneca said,
“Whenever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for kindness.”

At the Center for Health and Well-being, we promote these cost-effective prosocial behaviors by sharing four-week practices such as gratitude and volunteering. These and other well-being practices can be found through our portal, designed to enrich your daily life. To conclude, community is essential for well-being as well. Articles like “Celebrating Happiness Week: A Journey of Meaning and Connection Rooted in the Simple Practices of Everyday Life” and “Happiness: Where Nature, Community, and Purpose Meet” highlight how building community through small daily actions can cultivate lasting feelings of meaning and purpose.

Citations

• Cook, C. R., Fiat, A., Larson, M., Daikos, C., Slemrod, T., Holland, E. A., Thayer, A. J., & Renshaw, T. (2018). Positive Greetings at the Door: Evaluation of a Low-Cost, High-Yield Proactive Classroom Management Strategy. Journal of Positive Behavior Interventions, 20(3), 149-159. https://doi.org/10.1177/1098300717753831 (Original work published 2018)

• Lawrence E. Williams, John A. Bargh ,Experiencing Physical Warmth Promotes Interpersonal Warmth.Science322,606-607(2008).DOI:10.1126/science.1162548

• Hatfield, E., Cacioppo, J. T., & Rapson, R. L. (1993). Emotional Contagion. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 2(3), 96-100. https://doi.org/10.1111/1467-8721.ep10770953 (Original work published 1993)

• Ascigil, E., Gunaydin, G., Selcuk, E., Sandstrom, G. M., & Aydin, E. (2023). Minimal Social Interactions and Life Satisfaction: The Role of Greeting, Thanking, and Conversing. Social Psychological and Personality Science, 16(2), 202-213. https://doi.org/10.1177/19485506231209793 (Original work published 2025)

• Lyubomirsky, S., & Layous, K. (2013). How Do Simple Positive Activities Increase Well-Being? Current Directions in Psychological Science, 22(1), 57-62. https://doi.org/10.1177/0963721412469809 (Original work published 2013)

• Boothby, E. J., & Bohns, V. K. (2020). Why a Simple Act of Kindness Is Not as Simple as It Seems: Underestimating the Positive Impact of Our Compliments on Others. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 47(5), 826-840. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167220949003 (Original work published 2021)

• Hampshire A, Thompson R, Duncan J, Owen AM. Selective tuning of the right inferior frontal gyrus during target detection. Cogn Affect Behav Neurosci. 2009 Mar;9(1):103-12. doi: 10.3758/CABN.9.1.103. PMID: 19246331; PMCID: PMC2839483.

• Tops M, Boksem MA. A potential role of the inferior frontal gyrus and anterior insula in cognitive control, brain rhythms, and event-related potentials. Front Psychol. 2011 Nov 10;2:330. doi: 10.3389/fpsyg.2011.00330. PMID: 22084637; PMCID: PMC3212750.